10 Signs a Narcissist is Done with You

by Ryan Hart | Updated on October 4, 2023 | Post may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you may have noticed that they tend to have a pattern of behavior when they’re about to end things.

Knowing the signs that a narcissist is done with you can help you prepare for the inevitable and protect yourself from further emotional harm.

Couple arguing

What is Narcissism?

Self-centeredness, self-love, and a lack of empathy are characteristics of narcissism. It is a term from Greek mythology, where Narcissus fell in love with his reflection in a pool of water. The narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) falls under the category of personality disorders in the DSM-5.

People with NPD have an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. They often have a grandiose sense of self, believing they are superior to others. They may also have fragile self-esteem that is easily bruised by criticism or rejection.

Types of Narcissism

There are two main types of narcissism: grandiose narcissism and vulnerable narcissism.

Grandiose narcissism is characterized by a sense of entitlement, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. People with grandiose narcissism often have an inflated sense of self-importance and may engage in grandiose behaviors to maintain their sense of superiority.

Vulnerable narcissism, conversely, is characterized by a fragile self-esteem, a fear of rejection, and a need for constant reassurance. People with vulnerable narcissism may appear humble and self-effacing, but they are susceptible to criticism and rejection.

Narcissistic personality traits are not necessarily indicative of NPD. Many people exhibit narcissistic traits to some degree. Still, it is only when these traits become pervasive and cause significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other areas of functioning that a diagnosis of NPD can be made.

Understanding narcissism requires an understanding of its neurobiological underpinnings. However, it is essential to note that not all people with NPD have these neurobiological abnormalities, and not all people with these abnormalities have NPD.

How to Tell if You Are in a Relationship with a Narcissist

If you suspect that you may be in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s important to know the common traits and manipulative behavior that are often associated with this personality disorder.

Common Traits

Narcissists typically exhibit a sense of grandiosity, self-importance, and entitlement. They often have an inflated sense of self and believe that they are superior to others. This can manifest in arrogance, self-absorption, and a lack of empathy for others.

Narcissists also have a need for constant admiration and praise. They may become jealous or envious of others who receive attention or recognition and try to undermine or belittle those individuals to maintain their own sense of superiority.

Manipulative Behavior

Narcissists are often manipulative and may use a variety of tactics to control and manipulate those around them. They may use charm, flattery, or other forms of manipulation to gain the trust and admiration of others, only to turn on them when they no longer serve a purpose. They may also use guilt, shame, or other forms of emotional manipulation to control others.

It’s important to be aware of these signs of narcissism and manipulative behavior in order to protect yourself and maintain healthy relationships. If you suspect that you may be in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s crucial that you get support and guidance from a loved one, friend, or mental health professional.

How to Tell if a Narcissist is Done With You

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you may be wondering how to tell when they’re done with you. Here are some signs to look out for:

  • Devaluation: A narcissist may start to devalue you, making you feel worthless and unimportant. They may criticize you constantly, belittle your achievements, and make you feel like you can’t do anything right.
  • Emotional Distance: As a narcissist prepares to move on, they may create emotional distance between you and yourself. They may become cold, unresponsive, and indifferent to your emotional well-being. Their lack of empathy becomes more apparent, and they may dismiss or invalidate your emotions.
  • Dismissive Attitude: A narcissist may start to dismiss your opinions, thoughts, and feelings. They may act as if they don’t care about what you have to say and become increasingly disrespectful towards you.
  • Favorable Treatment: A narcissist may start to show favoritism towards someone else. They may begin to give someone else special treatment, privileges, and attention while ignoring or neglecting you.
  • Projection: A narcissist may start to project their own flaws and insecurities onto you. They may accuse you of being selfish, manipulative, or controlling when, in reality, they possess those traits.
  • Gaslighting: A narcissist may start to gaslight you, making you doubt your own perceptions and memories. They may twist the truth, deny things they previously said or did, and blame you for things that are not your fault.
  • Silent Treatment: A narcissist may use the silent treatment as a way to punish you and assert control. They may refuse to communicate with you, ignore your messages and calls, and give you the cold shoulder.
  • Triangulation: A narcissist may start to triangulate you with other people, such as their new partner or friends. They may use these people to make you feel jealous, insecure, or excluded.
  • Hoovering: A narcissist may try to hoover you back into their life, even after they have discarded you. They may use tactics such as love bombing, flattery, and promises of change to lure you back in.
  • Blame-Shifting: A narcissist may start to blame you for the problems in the relationship, even if they were the ones who caused them. They may refuse to take responsibility for their actions and instead shift the blame onto you.

Dealing with the End of the Relationship

If you suspect that a narcissist is done with you, it’s important to start preparing for the end of the relationship. Here are some tips:

  • Stay Calm: If a narcissist sense that you’re upset or anxious, they may use that to their advantage. Try to stay calm and composed, and don’t let them see that they’re getting to you.
  • Set Boundaries: If a narcissist is treating you poorly, it’s important to set boundaries. Let them know what behavior is unacceptable, and be prepared to walk away if they continue to disrespect you.
  • Get Support: Dealing with a narcissist can be exhausting and emotionally draining. It’s important to have a support system in place, whether it’s friends, family, or a therapist.
  • Focus on Yourself: When a narcissist is done with you, it’s easy to feel like you’re not good enough. Remember that their behavior does not reflect your worth as a person. Focus on taking care of yourself and doing things that make you happy.

How to Deal with a Breakup

The experience of dealing with a narcissist can be challenging and emotionally draining. It’s important to have coping mechanisms in place to protect yourself from the adverse effects of their behavior. Here are some strategies that can help you manage.

Establishing Boundaries

One of the most important things you can do when dealing with a narcissist is to establish clear boundaries. It can be helpful to write down your boundaries and communicate them clearly to the narcissist. This can help you protect yourself and maintain your emotional well-being.

Seek Therapy

If you are struggling to cope with the effects of narcissistic abuse, seeking therapy can be incredibly helpful. They can also help you work through any underlying issues that may be contributing to your vulnerability to narcissistic abuse.

Emotional Support

Having to deal with a narcissist can be isolating and lonely. It’s important to have emotional support from friends, family, or a support group. Surrounding yourself with people who understand what you’re going through and can offer you support and encouragement can help you cope with the effects of narcissistic abuse.

Frequently Asked Questions

How can you tell when a narcissist is no longer interested in you?

One of the primary signs that a narcissist is done with you is a noticeable lack of interest and engagement in the relationship. They may become emotionally distant and show disinterest in your life, thoughts, and feelings. They may also start to criticize or belittle you more frequently or become more controlling. If you notice any of these signs, it may be time to re-evaluate the relationship and consider ending it.

What are some signs that a narcissist is using you?

Narcissists often use people for their own gain. Some signs that a narcissist is using you include:

  • Constantly asking for favors or money.
  • Taking advantage of your kindness or generosity.
  • Not reciprocating your efforts in the relationship.

They may also manipulate you into doing things that benefit them while disregarding your own needs and feelings.

What behaviors indicate that a narcissist is cheating on you?

Narcissists may cheat on their partners as a way to boost their own ego and sense of power. Some signs that a narcissist is cheating on you include being emotionally distant, spending more time away from home, and being secretive about their whereabouts or activities. They may also become more critical of you or start to pick fights as a way to justify their infidelity.

What are some signs that a narcissist is physically done with you?

When a narcissist is physically done with you, they may start to withdraw from physical intimacy and affection. They may also stop spending time with you or make excuses to avoid being around you. In some cases, they may even start to be physically abusive or threatening towards you.

What behaviors suggest that a narcissist is emotionally done with you after a breakup?

After a breakup, a narcissist may become very cold and distant towards you. They may also blame you for the breakup or make you feel guilty for ending the relationship. They may also start to spread rumors or talk negatively about you to others to boost their ego and sense of power.

How do you know when a narcissist is truly finished with a relationship?

When a narcissist is truly finished with a relationship, they may simply cut off all contact with you and move on to someone else. They may also start to act very cold and distant towards you or become more critical and abusive. In some cases, they may even try to get revenge on you or make your life difficult as a way to boost their own ego and sense of power.

Bottom Line

Man walking away

In the event that you are in a relationship with someone who is a narcissist, it is important that you seek professional help. A therapist can help you navigate the dynamics of the relationship and provide you with coping strategies to cope.

Remember that you are not alone and that there is help available. When you receive the right support, you can begin to recover and move on from a toxic narcissistic relationship.

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About the Author:
Ryan Hart

Ryan Hart is a certified relationship coach and writer. His mission is to help make connections between people better, stronger, more meaningful, and longer lasting using technology.

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